636benjamin

November 29th, 2011 at 10:30AM

gq:

The 25 Least Influential People of 2011
Welcome to that other category of famous people: the ones who took up more than their fair share of oxygen and offered zero value in return, whose deeds did nothing to change lives of billions worldwide. Their one contribution to society? They make you, Mr. and Mrs. Everyday American, feel indispensable by comparison. This year yielded a particularly rich crop. So without further ado, GQ’s chief blackheart correspondent Drew Magary presents his list of the most useless bastards of 2011. Click here to see who made the full list and, drumroll, who Drew crowned as the single least influential person of this entire damn year. Just to give you a sense of the terrain, we share our two favorite honorees below:

7. Amy ChuaYou know her as the Tiger Mother, of course. Chua, who wrote an entire book about being the world’s strictest mother and did nothing to counter the shallow stereotype that Chinese parents are as emotionally accessible as a pair of boulders, existed this year specifically so that parents could read her book and say, “Fuck that lady. And fuck China.” Listen, Amy Chua. Just because you spent hours every night pushing the violin on your daughter doesn’t make me the asshole. If anything, I’m gonna be an even lazier parent thanks to you.
9. Hosni MubarakThis was the year of inept Middle Eastern dictatorships, and Mubarak became the gold standard by falling after a mere eighteen days of protests. Eighteen days! The Chinese government laughs at your lack of fortitude, Hosni. Egypt’s president for the past thirty years went from “I’m not going anywhere” to “Okay, I won’t run for reelection” to “Okay, I’m leaving” to “Okay, I might be in a coma” in virtually no time. Kind of awesome, when you think about it.

The 25 Least Influential People of 2011

Welcome to that other category of famous people: the ones who took up more than their fair share of oxygen and offered zero value in return, whose deeds did nothing to change lives of billions worldwide. Their one contribution to society? They make you, Mr. and Mrs. Everyday American, feel indispensable by comparison. This year yielded a particularly rich crop. So without further ado, GQ’s chief blackheart correspondent Drew Magary presents his list of the most useless bastards of 2011. Click here to see who made the full list and, drumroll, who Drew crowned as the single least influential person of this entire damn year. Just to give you a sense of the terrain, we share our two favorite honorees below:

7. Amy Chua
You know her as the Tiger Mother, of course. Chua, who wrote an entire book about being the world’s strictest mother and did nothing to counter the shallow stereotype that Chinese parents are as emotionally accessible as a pair of boulders, existed this year specifically so that parents could read her book and say, “Fuck that lady. And fuck China.” Listen, Amy Chua. Just because you spent hours every night pushing the violin on your daughter doesn’t make me the asshole. If anything, I’m gonna be an even lazier parent thanks to you.

9. Hosni Mubarak
This was the year of inept Middle Eastern dictatorships, and Mubarak became the gold standard by falling after a mere eighteen days of protests. Eighteen days! The Chinese government laughs at your lack of fortitude, Hosni. Egypt’s president for the past thirty years went from “I’m not going anywhere” to “Okay, I won’t run for reelection” to “Okay, I’m leaving” to “Okay, I might be in a coma” in virtually no time. Kind of awesome, when you think about it.